Saturday, June 29, 2019

Too much Truth - Blunt Truth

Schoolchildren sometimes play a game called “Honesty.” The rules are simple: For a designated period of time, the participants must tell the truth regardless of the subject. They then ask each other leading questions such as, “Do you like my hair?” “Do you think Lindsay is cute?” Inevitably someone gets angry when he or she discovers that these friends had been shading the truth, telling “little white lies,” to spare the person’s feelings. Even when the game is over, its lessons are not soon forgotten. Being honest with others doesn’t mean being brutal. It isn’t necessary to tell people everything you don’t like about them under the guise of being frank with them “for their own good.” Sometimes it’s better if we don’t know every person’s innermost feelings about us. Respect for another’s self-esteem often means telling them too little truth instead of too much.
Let's not forget verse from manusmruti.
सत्यं ब्रूयात् प्रियं ब्रूयान्न ब्रूयात् सत्यमप्रियम् ।
प्रियं च नानृतं ब्रूयादेष धर्मः सनातनः ॥
satyaṃ brūyāt priyaṃ brūyānna brūyāt satyamapriyam |
priyaṃ ca nānṛtaṃ brūyādeṣa dharmaḥ sanātanaḥ ||
He shall say what is true; and he shall say what is agreeable; he shall not say what is true, but disagreeale; nor shall he say what is agreeable, but untrue; this is the eternal law.

 

Moral Stories - OLD CHINESE Wisdom

Moral Stories - OLD CHINESE Wisdom

A farmer in ancient China had a neighbour who was a hunter, and who owned ferocious and poorly trained hunting dogs.

They jumped over the fence frequently and chased the farmer's lambs.

The farmer asked his neighbour to keep his dogs in check, but this fell on deaf ears.

One day the dogs again jumped the fence, attacked and severely injured several of the lambs.

The farmer had had enough, and went to town to consult a judge who listened carefully to the story and said: "I could punish the hunter and instruct him to keep his dogs chained or lock them up. But you would lose a friend and gain an enemy. Which would you rather have, friend or foe for a neighbour?"

The farmer replied that he preferred a friend.

“Alright, I will offer you a solution that keeps your lambs safe, and which will keep your a neighbour a friend."

Having heard the judge's solution, the farmer agreed.

Once at home, the farmer immediately put the judge's suggestions to the test.

He took three of his best lambs and presented them to his neighbour's three small sons, who were beside themselves with joy and began to play with them.

To protect his son's newly acquired playthings, the hunter built a strong kennel for his dogs.

Since then, the dogs never again bothered the farmer's lambs.

Out of gratitude for the farmer's generosity toward his sons, the hunter often shared the game he had hunted with the farmer.

The farmer reciprocated by sending the hunter the cheese he had made.

Within a short time the neighbours became good friends.

A Saying in Old China went something like this,

“One can win over and influence people the best with gestures of kindness and compassion.”

A similar Western Saying:

“One catches more flies with honey than with vinegar."

Let us make an effort  to make a pact that we will be polite when we speak and not make rude and sarcastic remarks at every opportunity we get, especially with our families, friends and colleagues.